On my bookshelf is a very small volume entitled “Dear Professor Einstein.” This book of Albert Einstein’s letters to and from children is dog-eared because it combines two of my favorites—the genius, the teacher, and the refreshingly human Albert Einstein, and the hilarious, often poignant, honesty of children.
The letters are an expression of the innate curiosity of children, who seem to understand, as does Einstein, that the freedom to share thoughts and express creativity is integral to human growth and happiness.
The need for such expression seems to be born with us, a part of our human spirit. But Einstein, one of the most influential people in human history, believed that the spirit of learning and creative thought were often lost through rote learning. He wrote, “It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.”
Einstein knew that when there is joy, there is learning. Where there is learning, there must be listening—a practice he greatly valued, not only as a physicist but as a philosopher who understood the needs of the human spirit.
Listening is crucial to learning, especially when we are lost or stuck and needing to find a way to move forward. As Jimmy Buffett of Margaritaville fame once said, “Older and wiser voices can help you find the right path if you are only willing to listen.”
It’s good advice for people of all ages. There is always someone older or wiser, than us.
We can help our children learn to listen to those voices of experience and wisdom by telling them stories—bits of family history, embarrassing moments, inspirational accomplishments, and inspirational people. It simply needs to engage their attention.
When the story is over, we can invite them to share their thoughts or stories of their own to become listeners. The experience of sharing stories of the heart, being allowed to ask questions, and discuss ideas within a community of love and shared beliefs can be transformational.
Some people are natural-born listeners, but most are not. It is a skill that can be developed when children experience opportunities for listening, which is a crucial part of being present to others.
There is available wisdom in every moment that we listen, but listening requires focus— though not only on ourselves. By learning to listen, we, and our children, develop empathy with others by truly making an effort to understand what the other is feeling or saying, with or without words.
Philosopher and theologian Paul Tillich put it succinctly: “The first duty of love is to listen.”
Mary Regina Morrell, mother of six and grandmother to nine, is a Catholic journalist, author, and syndicated columnist who has served the dioceses of Metuchen and Trenton, New Jersey, and RENEW International in the areas of catechesis and communication.